Let Me Live

"I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly." -John 10:10

"I wanted to live deep and suck all the marrow out of life, to put to rout all that which was not life, and not when I had come to die discover that I had not lived." -Henry David Thoreau

Is it cliche to say that I have a whole new lease on life?

To recap and explain everything that has happened in the last month would be quite the undertaking, so I'm not going to try. By all rights, for reasons I won't take the time to explain here, it really should have been a rough month, and at times it has been. But overall I'm filled with this overwhelming happiness and excitement. It would make a lot of sense for me to be broken up... but I'm not. I'm probably the most content I've ever been in my life.

I want to go to Heaven. I want to go to Heaven so bad. That's the most important thing. I've got to learn to cling to the things and people that are going to get me to Heaven and run far away from the things that are pulling me the other direction.

I also have to learn that I can live on the way there. In John 10:10 Jesus wasn't talking about eternal life. He was talking about this life. Christians have the ability to have the most abundant lives possible.

So you know what? I want to live.

I want to fill my days up with people and things that make me love God even more than I did previously. I want to use my talents to His glory in the greatest way I possibly can. I want to dig into God's Word so much my head spins from how amazing it all is. I want praying to come as naturally as breathing to me. I want to be so close to God that His will is my will, no matter where that will takes me.

I want to write. Oh man, I want to write. I want to write articles. I want to write books. I want to write blog posts. I want to write poetry just to get things out of my system. I want to start the second Renaissance with Jenna. I want to read good books and understand what they're saying.

I want to sing. I stinkin' love to sing, you know that? I want to dance around my room when no one is watching just because it feels good. I want to listen to the music that makes my heart soar. I want to go walking around in the rain and feel the water dance across my skin. I want to hear thunder rolling and see lightning crash and marvel at how incredible this world is and how awesome my God is.

I want to reach for the sky, not for the ceiling. I don't want limits unless they're the limits God has placed in my life through His word and my desire to get to Heaven. I want to lay aside every encumbrance that entangles me and GET THERE.

More than anything I want to NOT WANT WHAT I WANT! I want to want what He wants, because what more could I want?

So... I want to live this summer. And I'm going to.

<3